forward

If you read that and subject line and heard Johnny Five in your head, you are my kin in spirit if not in flesh.

So, this is a rambling about writing entry -- on the assumption that I have regular readers out there somewhere, in some other dimmension, if you don't care for the writing blather this is the time to go out for coffee.  Speaking of which, my tea has nearly run out and is cold, and coffee sounds really good. 

Right, that's settled -- coffee brewing.  So, forward.  Writing. 

Today is The Day.  Maybe.  Okay, that's not the power of positive thinking, Robert Schuller -- no really, today is The Day, no maybes.  Today I will establish the first working, beginning to end outline of Governess.  There will be three acts.  I thought for awihle four, and there could probably be a debate that act two is really acts two and three, but I believe we shall stick with the traditional three.  I think I might even know the end.  But when this happens today, on The Day, we reach a Heidi milestone as significant as the completing of the collage and reaching page 100 for the first time.  Because once I have a real working outline, I start drafting in a serious way.

Okay, maybe that's a lie, because I got a working outline for the farm story last summer and haven't touched it since, but there were kind of extenuating circumstances.  One was that I had the outline but I could still feel there was stuff to noodle. Also, I realized I was going to have to write bits I was at that time scared to write -- still am, but at that particular moment I just couldn't go there.  And really, if I hadn't, ATOS wouldn't be done. 

But this is definitely a Forward moment.  Right now it's almost as if telling myself the story in my head and watching Heidi's Personal Visualization is almost enough.  As soon as I start this outline, though, I'll be chomping to get the stuff written out so I can see it and share it with other.  And that's when the real hell begins, because no matter how good that outline is, Things Will Go Wrong.  The story will shift.  New characters will appear and then die off, and invariably I'll show the draft to somebody who, when the story is finished will still be thinking wistfully of Joe the Butler or somebody they bonded to and then I cut to pieces.  Right now I'd be worried about Froggie.  Except I'm bonding to Froggie, though I cut Fielding in ATOS and I thought I'd never do that.

Mind wandering.  Forward.

But it's going to happen.  I'm going to finish the outline, and then the great drafting starts.  I will move beyond page 100 and into act two.  And I have to say, I really like this story.  I'm really excited about it still, which is fantastic.  It's very possible I'm focusing on symbol and theme too early.  Almost without question I'm forcing stuff that shouldn't be there. 

I wonder if that's because I keep hearing Karen Harbaugh's voice in my head, saying to do things that will delight the reader.  At this point I might be mostly delighting myself, but I think that counts.  Like, I'm keeping the lavender bonnet.  I wrote this sequence I knew I had to cut -- my God, it killed the pacing, but it was so cute.  And in it the hero buys this bonnet for the heroine beacuse she lost hers, and his friend tells him he can't buy the governess that fancy of a hat, and he's right because the hat the hero is looking at is the prettiest in the shop.  It is not a governess hat.  And yet he goes back later and buys it for her but doesn't give it to her.  And it's my favorite part of the book so far.

So I found a place it fits and I'm going to put it in, and at the moment it's serving a very important job.  But even if I cut it again later, it's making me feel light and magical and airy while I write it, and I admit, I keep thinking of stuff Ellen will like when I write it, or things I hope she will.  Or Dan.  Or people in general.  Or Karen.

But we're definitely moving forward -- that is, we are as soon as I stop blogging and surfing the Crusie/Mayer blog and yelling at Chris because my computer won't load the disturbing "Whip It" video.

Which would be right now.  Or, right after I go get that coffee which is definitely done brewing now.